August 5, 2016
Tiny Emotional Insight
I think people are resistant to solving their problems because they feel like a solution would implicate them in the problem.
Whenever I complain of a headache, and Bill tells me, “You should take some ibuprophen,” I resist the suggestion for a second. Part of me thinks, “You don’t understand. This is unfair. I didn’t cause this problem. Why do I have to solve it? Why can’t it just go away on its own, the way it came?” I feel like taking responsibility for addressing my headache would mean taking responsibility for having my headache. Like, if I can cure it, I must somehow have caused it. Like I’m being accused of wanting this headache somehow. So rather than being grateful that ibuprophen exists, and immediately using it to help myself, I get grumpy and resentful, and it’s like…but the ibuprophen is so far away… and I have a headache.